Skiing sensation Lindsey Vonn of the U.S. said she could be out of the 2010 winter Olympics because of a severely bruised right shin. The two-time reigning overall World Cup winner sustained the injury while training in Austria on Feb. 3. This injury, what she described as “bleeding of the muscle, a major contusion,” is worse, she said, because it covers a six-inch area where her boot pushes on her leg. On a slalom training run just over a week ago, Vonn went over the front of her skis and hyper-extended her leg, putting major force on her shin.
This is terrible news. Granted, I had no idea who Lindsey Vonn was until I saw this beautiful (and controversial) Sports Illustrated cover a week ago, but now I feel like my Olympics are ruined. Whats left for me now? Rooting for the Jamaican bobsled team, and trying to figure out how someone first gets involved in curling? Don’t worry Lindsey, even if you cant win your country gold you can always just be really hot and do sexually suggestive magazine covers instead. We like that much better than skiing anyways.
It’s normal to be afraid of something you don’t understand. For example, math, Tyler Perry, or whether or not girls actually fart are all quite scary things. However, I’m sure with a little research you’ll find that whatever was scaring you is really just Canadians with flashlights…
Thirteen-year-old Andrew Wiggins will be a member of the 2014 recruiting class. It’s far too early to project where he’s going to go to college. Heck, it’s probably far too early to even be talking about a 13-year-old basketball player. The whole thing feels weird and exploitative, like when Billy Gillispie had to be told to stop soliciting commitments from 12-year-olds. It’s naughty.
Mr. Wiggins appears to already have a fine-tuned post game; he’s taking drop steps and hitting little baby hooks with both hands. This actually makes sense: Wiggins, a Canadian citizen, is the son of former NBA player Mitchell Wiggins and Marita Payne, an Olympic track star from Canada. The two met when they were student-athletes at Florida State.
Jesus, what they hell do they feeds these kids these days? On top of that, does anybody believe that some kid from Canada is the next big thing in basketball? As nasty as he is I am not impressed. I mean c’mon people, this 13-year old, 6′6″ freak is schooling players who’s balls havent dropped yet. If your gonna at least crown this kid as the future of Canadian basketball then at least strap on a pair of skates and play like a real man.Â
And where is the goalie in these games…the little fuck is practically non-existant. “Oh wait, what do you mean there is no goalie….isnt Canadian basketball some ass-backwards immitation sport like the CFL.” Fucking canadians!
I think you got your answer, Chad Kroeger. There are no Nickelback fans in Portugal. They would much rather throw another rock at your head and go home than be subjected to one more second of your Canadian pop rock crap.  I salute the Portuguese. They are a proud people, and they have earned my respect today. Nickelback is the worst thing to come out of Canada since denim shirts. They have somehow sold 30 million records, a feat that can only be explained by the growing number of head injuries and cases of down syndrome in this country.
