The Smokey the Bear- Sitting up in missionary, light her pubes on fire and extinguish the flames with your load.
The Tiger Woods- While having sex with your mistress, throw her legs over your shoulder and kindly reach under her ass. Feel around to make sure the greens are cut and then putt one of your balls into her asshole.
The Dr. Zoidberg- Take her extra roast beef into your mouth and proceed to exclaim, “Look at me! I’m Dr. Zoidberg!” as her meat slaps against your lips.
The Davy Jones- Same as above except with girls that were cursed with the double quarter-pounder vag.
The Walt Disney- When in a 69 with a 12 year old, spread her asshole and insert a mouse.
The Na’vi- When she goes down to give you head, grab her pony tail and proceed to tickle your asshole with it.
The Sarah Palin- Order a Russian bride. Make her stand on the other side of the room and see if you can hit her in the face with your man juice from your side of the bed.
The Bernie Madoff- Tell every chick you meet you have a 10 inch penis and proceed to disappoint them with your microscopic meat stick.
The Michael Vick- Invite two girls over and let them fight over which one gets to suck your dick.
The Snidely Whiplash- Place your mouth on her pussy, grab each side of her labia and twist like an evil mustache saying, “Yes…. Yes…. Yes…”
The Dale Earnhardt- Stand out in front of the bed. Run as fast as you can and then faceplant directly into her vaginal walls.
The Bear Grylls- Have her place her hands on each side of your dick and start rubbing them together until your balls catch on fire. Then she administers a golden shower survival demonstration to put it out.
The George W Bush- Get her naked and wet by telling her what you are going to do to her. Say “Mission accomplished!” and leave.
